Where Are You, God?

Sometimes life just sucks. It’s not like some huge catastrophic thing has to happen and turn your world upside down. Often, it can just be a small series of annoying or painful or sad things that add up to a great big feeling of ‘life just plain sucks’. Sometimes it feels like no one is looking out for you. Sometimes it isn’t even that deep, you just feel sad or tired. Period.

In a way, what makes it harder is being a believer. If I didn’t know Jesus, I could just think that the universe was out to get me, or that I’d done something to mess up my karma. I could eat, drink and be merry, for tomorrow we die. But, knowing what I know, I also know that Jesus has a place of peace for me if I can find it, or figure out how to get there. I know that Jesus’ plans are to prosper me and not to harm me. I am supposed to live the victorious life as a child of the King.

Will bad stuff still happen to us. Yup. The fact is, when you are born into the Kingdom, you were born into the middle of a war. Worse yet, you were born behind enemy lines, surrounded by a world of hurt and temptation. And we have a real enemy. Don’t ever take it for granted the devil wants you dead. He will take you out the first chance he gets, any way he can. Sorry to sound all doom and gloom, but the Bible says that people perish in their ignorance. Don’t be ignorant of the war! And don’t be ignorant of the tactics the enemy will use to sidetrack you into slipping up. 

I’ll leave it up to you to figure out what he uses in your life to keep you from entering God’s peace and rest. For me, it’s busy-ness, and reminding me of painful things that have happened to me. He likes to paint events in a light that makes the Father look indifferent to my suffering, rather than the One who is trying to pull me from the pit of despair. I have had things in my life that made me feel like Job. What I can’t seem to get is how Job went through it without sinning. Sometimes I am SO angry with God. He could have prevented the bad stuff that happened in my life. I mean, He’s God, right? Seriously, WTF? (that’s ‘what the fart’, in case you were offended.)

Hmm. If Jesus is our perfect example of how to live victoriously in God, did He ever go through this? Did He ever feel like God didn’t give a rip about His situation? Yup. That’s why He cried out from the cross, “My God, my God, why have you forsaken me?” On the cross. Yikes. I’ve never had it that bad. But I have felt like Crying out at times, “WHERE ARE YOU, GOD??”

Sadly, we have built an entire theology around how God turned away from Jesus on the cross. We say, “Well, you know, God can’t look at sin, so when Jesus took the sin of the world, God had to turn away. That’s why Jesus cried out. Because God left Him.” Ummmmm... I have a serious problem with that. The more I get to know the heart of the Father, the more I KNOW that what He said is true- “Never will I leave you; never will I forsake you.” (Deuteronomy 31:6) Jesus said it again after His resurrection (and He only spoke what He heard the Father saying) “I am with you always, to the end of the age.” (Matthew 28:20)

We include in our ‘theology’, how this was another prophetic sign that Jesus was the Messiah, because He said what David prophesied He would in Psalm 22. (Psalm 22 is a prophetic psalm about the coming messiah.) The very first line of the psalm is “My God, my god, why have you forsaken me?” And it gets more depressing from there. Thank goodness it doesn’t end with the depressing stuff, though. Here’s the part we seem to ignore when we are applying it to Jesus on the cross. 

“I will declare your name to my brothers; in the congregation I will praise you.

You who fear the Lord, praise him!

All you descendants of Jacob, honor him!

Revere him, all you descendants of Israel!

For he has not despised or disdained the suffering of the afflicted one;

he has not hidden his face from him but has listened to his cry for help.”

-Psalm 22:22-24

So, the psalm goes on to say that God didn’t turn his face away, but listened to his cry for help!

Why do we always think the worst of God? Oh yeah. The enemy. Right. 

Satan will try his hardest to get you to think the worst of God. If we start to listen to the enemy, we withdraw from God’s love. You see, the gospels are only telling us what the disciples heard and saw. Matthew describes Jesus on the cross, but he was only able to describe one side of the conversation. He could only tell us what Jesus said, but I believe there was more going on than what the disciples could sense with their natural senses. 

In my experience, when I have been at my lowest and cried out to God, He always answers with a reassuring word- a word of comfort. I have even more respect for Job- knowing that he didn’t sin in his pain, and he didn’t have the indwelling Holy Spirit to help him! What excuse do I have when I think the worst of God and throw myself a pity party, believing that He must have left me to fend for myself this time? He will never leave me. He will never forsake me. Will bad stuff happen? Yes. Will I get wounded in the war? Yes. Will the Father turn away from me in my time of need? Never. Will He answer me with love and comfort? Yes, but I have to receive it. I have to be open to Him, and kick the devil in the teeth when he accuses God of being indifferent or even negligent in His care for me. What kind of loving parent would leave their children to fend for themselves in the hardest trials of life? When you are going through the hardest, most painful times of life, God is just as present as when you are getting blessed at a conference. HE WILL NEVER LEAVE YOU.

So, what was the example Jesus gave us on the cross? He cried out from His pain. But then what? If God answered Him, it wasn’t with a booming voice from heaven, because the disciples would have heard that. Is it possible that Jesus was in God’s rest, even on the cross? Was he able to quiet His soul enough to step into His spirit? Could He hear God while He was in agony on the cross? I wouldn’t be sure, if Matthew was the only disciple to describe the crucifixion.

Luke describes how Jesus asked the Father to forgive the ones who were crucifying Him. He told the thief He would see Him in paradise. (Was he blowing smoke, or do you think He could have had a word of knowledge?) He also made sure His mother would be taken care of by John when He left. (And do you think He could have known without a Word from the Father that John would be the only disciple to survive the persecution, and therefore take care of His mother?) Put the stories together, and you get a picture of Jesus coming to a place of peace, and hearing the Father, even on the cross. 

So, when life sucks, (and dying on a cross definitely sucks), the key is to step into God’s peace and rest, and let Him speak words of love and comfort over you. The key is to be stepping into rest and peace, communing with God’s Spirit in the good times, so that when the trials come you know how to do it. That’s why Jesus spent so much time alone   throughout the gospels. It says over and over again, (even when there were crowds of people who needed ministry), that Jesus withdrew to a quiet place to commune with the Father.

And hey, life sucks sometimes, but I’m still breathing! There’s a reason for the things that happen. One thing I know for sure though: God is still GOOD, and His plans are for my good. And He will never leave me to suffer through it alone. Don’t ever forget, God doesn’t cause the bad things to happen. But He’s right there with His hand held out to you, ready to help you through it. (And give you a great big hug!!)

Oh, and one more thing, a big thank you to Brad Jersak for busting some of my paradigms. I didn’t come to all these conclusions on my own. Thanks for making me read all of Psalm 22. God bless you. :o)